When we’re feeling stuck, it often feels like there’s no way out. But it is possible to get unstuck, reclaim your agency and change your perspective to see the world through a different lens. Here are some tips to get you started:
1. Get clear on what’s really going on.
Many times, our feelings of stuckness are caused by misunderstandings of what is actually happening in the situation at hand. Whether you’re stuck at work or in a relationship, the best thing you can do is take a step back and look at your situation objectively. It’s incredibly helpful to write down your thoughts and feelings about the situation, but don’t let that get in the way of getting clear on what is actually occurring.
2. Focus on what you can control.
When you’re feeling stuck, it can be easy to turn inward and start blaming other people for what’s not working out in your life. This can be a difficult habit to break, but remember that most of the time, you are in control of your own life. If you’re in a relationship, it might help to ask yourself why you want this particular relationship to work out and what the most important elements of that are.
3. Make a plan to move forward.
A big part of feeling stuck is a lack of future vision. When you’re feeling stuck, it can help to spend time journaling about goals you want to achieve in your personal and professional lives. It may also help to create a vision board or book yourself on a workshop or retreat that will allow you to explore your interests and generate excitement and energy for what is coming next.
4. Start with choice points, not why.
One of the most effective ways to move from feeling stuck to moving is to shift from asking why to naming three choices (or micro-yes’s) available right now. You can then choose which one will get you to the most forward momentum. This is very similar to the approach that is taken when someone is on fire—it’s much more effective to get them out of the building than it is to debate why the house is on fire. This is because insight doesn’t equal action, but moving does.