Whether they blossom into something romantic or go unrequited, crushes are fascinating to behold. They teach us a lot about ourselves, even if they don’t end up as anything more than a fleeting infatuation.
The word crush is used to describe feelings of intense interest or infatuation, typically for someone who is considered very attractive. It’s a term that can be applied to both men and women, and it’s fairly common for people to have multiple crushes at once.
Having a crush is similar to having a major attraction, but it’s generally less pronounced than the feelings that come with a full-blown relationship. For example, if you have a crush on a friend of yours, you might spend a lot of time thinking about them and analyzing what it is about them that you find so appealing. You might even flirt with them to see if they reciprocate your interest, but you probably wouldn’t invite them over for dinner or take them on a date.
A crush usually develops in high school or college and tends to disappear as the person grows older and gains more life experience. However, some people never grow out of their crushes and have them throughout their entire lives. This can be a sign that they are not ready for a serious relationship or simply aren’t compatible with their current partners.
The first thing to do if you have a crush is to keep it in check. If you are able to do that, you might be able to use it to your advantage by slowly advancing things in the way that feels right to you and your crush. This will likely depend on how much you know them, if any, and how their interests align with yours (for example, their partnerships, if any, or their job if it’s a work crush).
If you decide to act on your crush, it may be helpful to consider whether you are doing this because of positive benefits or negative ones. Participants in one study who responded to open-ended questions about their current crushes reported that fun and excitement were the most common perceived benefits. Other themes that emerged included fantasy, a self-esteem boost, ancillary improvements to their primary relationships, and novelty.
A crush can also refer to a situation in which an object or person is crushed, such as when a vehicle or building collapses during a natural disaster or when a body part is squeezed between two heavy objects. A crush injury can be dangerous and sometimes life-threatening. If you think that someone you know has been injured in this manner, call 911 and seek immediate medical treatment. This is especially important if you think that the person may have internal organ or blood vessel damage or a fractured bone.