A crush is an intense, romantic, and uncontrollable feeling that manifests as a strong desire for someone. It can be a celebrity, friend, coworker or even a neighbor who you find attractive and irresistible. This type of attraction is normal and it is important to understand that it is okay to have a crush on someone else.
Having a crush can make you feel nervous, anxious and excited. This is because the body experiences a fight-or-flight response, which causes a rapid heartbeat, increased oxygen intake and dilated pupils. It can also cause headaches, a racing mind and feelings of uncontrollability.
If you are in a relationship, it can be difficult to admit that you have a crush on someone. This is because people in relationships tend to rate potential alternatives as less desirable than their partners. However, if you are in a non-committed relationship or single, it is perfectly acceptable to have a crush on someone. In fact, it can be healthy and even beneficial for a person to have a crush on another person outside their current relationship.
In our study, we recruited 123 adults who reported having a crush on someone else. The participants were divided into two groups based on whether they were in an established relationship that includes exclusivity (partnered) or not (singles). The participants were asked to describe their crushes by answering open-ended questions. The open-ended responses were coded for positive and negative outcomes. Positive outcomes most commonly included having fun and excitement and having a source of fantasy. A lesser number of positive outcomes included ancillary improvements to their primary relationships and novelty.
Despite their different statuses, the participants in our study shared many similar experiences with their crushes. The majority of participants described their crushes as “attractions from afar,” with very few indicating that they wanted or expected an intimate relationship to develop. The findings of our study are consistent with previous research that has characterized crushes as attractions from afar.
In the past, researchers have examined crushes among individuals who are either single or in a committed relationship. However, these studies have failed to examine the differences between those who are in a relationship and those who are not. In addition, the previous studies have not controlled for participants’ age and/or gender. By examining these variables, we can better understand the unique dynamics of crushes for those in a relationship. In the future, we hope to expand our study to include additional demographic characteristics of those who report having a crush and their psychological, emotional, and behavioral outcomes. This may help us to identify what factors are associated with crushes and their implications for relationships, situationships, and almost-ships.